Read on for great advice on how to get back that long lost love!
10 Things Not To Do!
Did you just go through a serious breakup? Do you miss your ex and wonder why it had to end so soon? If you see yourself doing any of the things listed below, it is quite obvious why you haven't been able to get your ex girlfriend back. Help is right around the corner!
1. Panicking
No one ever thinks things through when they panic. And most people panic after a serious breakup. Panic leads to impaired judgment, and impaired judgment leads to going incredibly stupid things. Doing something stupid and completely our of character is a sure-fire way to distance your ex......a very very long distance.
2. Becoming Clingy
Another great way to make sure your ex will never want you back is to become super clingy. Phone calls, text messages, stopping by "because you were in the neighborhood?" NO ONE wants to be pestered, especially not someone who may be extremely upset with you about something you may or may not have done.
3. Trying to Buy Her Back
Are you showing up at ex's work or home with flowers, candies, cards, and anything sappy that can be bought in or around a flower shop? Not only is this needy and desperate, it is annoying to your ex! Think about the relationship you had before, did you show up everyday with flowers and an "I Love You Always" teddy bear? Probably not. This is not how your ex fell in love with you, and it most certainly not going to win her back.
4. Obvious Avoidance
Don't try to avoid your ex if you secretly want to get back together with her. How much sense does that make? Maybe you work together, maybe you are in the same class, heck you could even be lab partners.....don't ignore her. She will assume you are bitter about the breakup, start avoiding you as well, and the gap between you two will become so large that getting back together will never be a possibility again.
5. Spilling Your Guts Out
Looking desperate is not the way your ex wants to see you, so if you run into her at the mall, don't drop to your knees and tell her how much you love and miss her in front of half the city. Not only are you embarrassing her, you are embarrassing yourself, and this is a HUGE mistake that thousands of people make every year because of that very first bulletpoint.....panic.
6. Letting Her Control You
Women, specifically, look for a strong and able man to be able to save them if they need to be rescued. If you give her the power to handle the relationship, and or relationship problems, then she is losing that sense of security she needs in a great partner. She will see her ex boyfriend as weak, and who wants to be with someone who is weak? I know I don't!
7. Losing Yourself and Looking Terrible
After a breakup, some people get totally immersed with the feeling of hopelessness that they forget who they are. Overeating, binge drinking, isolating yourself from the outside world......try to remain positive and stay away from self-destructive behaviors. That is not how your ex wants to see you, and that is not how your friends and family want to see you either.
8. Talking to Her Friends/Family About the Breakup
Your ex's friends and family will always take their side. That is why they are your EX'S friends and family, not yours. You should know that everything you say to them is going to trickle down and make its way to your ex. If you are crying and sobbing about how much you need your ex back, when maybe you had been together for a couple months, you may scare her away. Yelling or complaining to her friends and family is only going to make them blame you for the breakup, so do yourself a favor and cut off all ties to them until a resolution has been made between you and your former sweetie.
9. Relying Too Much on Others' Opinions
Friends are there to comfort and listen to others when they are in their time of need. Advice and opinions are always welcome, but don't over do it. Usually people give advice based on their own experiences, and if their is something about the breakup that reminds them of the past, they may get a little emotional and offer bad advice, leading you to do or say something to an ex that you wouldn't normally say or do. Because someone else told you it was the right thing to say or do.
10. Going It Alone
Yes, it is your problem that this has happened. It may or may not be your fault. But, there is always a circle of people willing to help any way they can because they see that you are distraught. Don't try to do this alone, you need support of friends and family, and when necessary, tell them your plans to get your ex back and maybe you can run through exercises on the RIGHT things to do and say.
I'm ready to win back my ex girlfriend now!
